High School Reunion Take Two

Attending high school reunions has been a part of the American culture for decades. And now it is time for my 40th. (Somehow I missed the invites for all of the others but wasn't as fortunate this time." This imposing event is sending me down memory lane--the twists and turns of those memories are wrecking havoc on my emotions and adding to this old lady's sleeplessness. I wonder if anyone else feels these mixed emotions over a reunion??!!

First, I had to remember all the classmates I have not thought of in years. Wasn't that girl shy and quiet?? How did she end up in charge 40 years later? What would make me remember another's freckles and yet another in braces with red hair?? One girl I remember as being plain with long straight hair (remember we were part of the hippie generation and lots of us idolized Cher's long straight locks) and a peak at her face book profile revealed a knock dead gorgeous woman--I want to know her secrets. Someone posted on her status she had some type of disease requiring that she run, bike, swim, etc. Dear Lord, I hope she shows up at the reunion and coughs on me. Please let that disease be contagious!!!

My brain has been spinning trying to remember everyone I chose to befriend on face book. I can't help but remember the "Designing Women" episode where Delta Burke returns to her high school reunion. She made some speech about seeing the old, balding, pot-bellied men as the handsome young studs they were in high school. I don't remember what she said about the women but I share the feelings she had about returning as an old fat lady. I did notice in perusing face book photos that we had traded those embarrassing pimples for a lot of smile lines--on our foreheads, around our eyes, and around our mouths. (If I knew then what I know now, dimples be damned, I would have spent the last 40 years perfecting that stoic look!)

For some strange reason, I have no problem recognizing the women--they look like they did in high school plus or minus a few pounds. I am thinking Lady Clairol helped with that. However, the men--no clues on their faces even remotely remind me of the boys I drooled over in high school. (Except for one--his smiles and grin in some Nicky's photos--I would recognize anywhere!) This isn't necessarily good or bad--just weird.

Now I am stressing over what people remember about me from those teenage years. Did people know that my loud mouth hid an insecure and shy teenager. Was I the only teen that could not figure out how many times to say hi to classmates in the hallways and classes that you might pass a million times during the day. I kind of worked on the premise that a "good morning" before lunch and a "see you tomorrow" at the end of the day should suffice. I can remember spending lunch recess in the library to avoid facing this dilemma. Forty years later I am worried that people might have thought me snobby--talk about over analyzing!!

Someone in a face book invite stated a reunion was the time to remember the good times of high school. What good times? I have taught high school for years and I am not sure much has changed. My students freak over everything--just as I did in high school-- hair, boys that I wanted to notice me and the boys that did, my dad's car I drove that he painted with house paint, clothes, pimples, dates, parties I went to and those I didn't get invited to. I can remember having a day long discussion with my next door neighbor about where to sit in the car on my first date with an upper classman--all that time and energy wasted because he had bucket seats.

The most humiliating moment of my teen years had to be when our church youth group went to see "The Ten Commandments" at the Strand in downtown Shreveport. I had a free pass I had won by listening to KEEL--anybody else remember Larry Ryan and Mr, Weather?? The theater would not accept my pass and I had little money. A boy named Robert rescued me and bought my ticket--he was an upperclassman. I know now he was being so sweet but I was so embarrassed!!!

At last I am remembering some of the good times. I had some great boyfriends and dates. I loved driving the trail from Kokomo to McDonald's to Pizza Inn and back to Kokomo with girlfriends-- searching for boys and trying to find out who was dating whom. I missed very few if any football games even going to South Louisiana for playoffs. I remember kicking The Joe Ferguson in the shin on the football field after Woodlawn beat Airline the year we took state. I remember passing notes in so many different codes that I am now an ace at cryptograms. I remember walking around Lake Bistineau with my best friend and a really cute guy, laughing and chatting about everybody and everything--while the rest of the guys were "partying" (and by that I mean sinning) inside someone's fishing cabin. I even remember skipping Algebra II so that I could hang out on first lunch shift knowing the secretary would write me an excused pass when the bell rang--she even got me a scholarship to Northwestern. Ok. I admit there were some fun times.

Years later looking at the yearbook, in a moment of arrogance and superiority, I remember thinking how few of us went to college. I now realize we must have been one of the smartest classes to ever graduate Airline. We have doctors and lawyers and business owners and lots of educators!! I am really impressed with all of us!! I wonder if our teachers could predict the great successes from this high school class??!!

Yep--my mind has been spinning --with both good and bad memories--of fun and lots of embarrassing moments.

Back to that reunion thing. Do people sit around and gossip--remember when he or she-- thinking about what might be said about me feeds that old insecurity that no amount of awards and recognition that I have received as an adult can erase. Am I the only one who thinks this way?? Of course this is making a lot of assumptions. I am fairly intelligent and still in possession of most of my senses--if I am having difficulty remembering everyone--shouldn't that mean others may have the same difficulty remembering me??!!

Ok-- if I concede that gossiping will be kept to a minimum then what do these friends and acquaintances who have become strangers after 40 years talk about?? Do they compare achievements and successes?? Hey--I was on local TV in Shreveport for weeks and weeks cuz of a grant I received--did anybody see me or even know it was me?? To be honest with the reader and myself, I would like to know who the millionaires of our class are and I would like to know if they need a great PR person or even an administrative assistant that will travel the world----me!! Seriously,I'm thinking no one really cares after 40 years.

In Galveston, I avoid arrogant people. I love that some of the PhD's and millionaires look homeless and some of the homeless walk around "stylin..". I have always tried to judge people by their hearts--don't most people do the same--especially at our age!!?? (Well maybe not the Donald Trumps of the world.)

Back to this reunion thing one more time. I took a Gestalt (sp.?) therapy class in college. We filled out a survey putting the names of our classmates in the blank spaces. Questions like "the life of the party is.... The person serving everyone is...". The class completely misjudged me (in a very complimentary way I might add). I knew that the only way I would be able to talk to people at a party would be if I were serving the punch. Darn--can't possibly go to the reunion--those darn bartenders took my job!!